I'm slightly nervous for my senior year of high school, for multiple reasons.

I feel quite alone, already, at the thought of having no friends with which to 'hang'; I feel stressed that I will be working a lot, volunteering, and trying to maintain A's in AP classes; I feel...unloved, I suppose, because of my lack of...relationships that have helped me grow as a person. That probably made little to no sense, but I wish that I could find a boy to take my mind away from my friends. I had that with Matt...I don't want to think about that right now.

I'm nervous, frightened, sad, anxious, are there anymore synonyms? Should I quit typing?


Another thing: I have not written anything for a while. No poetry, no fic-lets, no short stories. I contemplated writing some sort of 'closure' pieces for the characters that I must leave to my ex-best-friend, but I can't bring myself to even think about it. I feel torn between one final send-off for those brain-children and acknowledging that they'll ever not be there in case I need them.

I may seem strange that I'm attached to figments of my imagination, but I put a lot of time, effort, and love into them and I feel that they deserve a nice...resting place. How awful-sounding. Perhaps I'll write a poem about it.